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January 14, 2011

Not Open For Business

When my reexamination appellant brief exceeded 30 pages, I received notice of it being "defective." To correct the defect, under MPEP ยง1.943(c), a certificate is required to state that the brief is less than 14,000 words (the brief is an illustrated comic book: lots of pictures, because words alone just don't seem to register). Do I simply need to provide a certificate, or is the required response more elaborate? However reasonable the question, the answer was not forthcoming. The supervisory paralegal at 571-272-9797 listened to my question, then passed me off to another department at 571-272-7705 (central reexam), who passed me off to 571-272-7726, who passed me off to 571-272-7701, who then said it should be answered at 571-272-9797, the original number called. Calling central reexam at 7705 from the outside just gets a busy signal. Perhaps the patent office should adopt the slogan of mutual funds: "past performance is not an indicator of future returns."

Posted by Patent Hawk at January 14, 2011 2:16 PM | The Patent Office

Comments

Perhaps you should get an independent legal opinion.

Do you know any attorneys?

Posted by: Pedantic Pete at January 14, 2011 4:22 PM

You might try your local congressional rep.

Sometimes very helpful w/gov agencies.

Posted by: Congressman at January 14, 2011 6:23 PM

Are the pictures in black and white? They may want to color them in themselves...

This would be funny, except that I know its true.
Good luck.

Posted by: Patrick at January 17, 2011 1:33 AM

"Color" is an exception in the patent world Patrick.

Shades of gray, on the other hand, are rampant.

Posted by: Pedantic Pete at January 17, 2011 9:43 AM

Well, I'm surely no expert, or a lawlyer, nor do I provide legal advice. But I can read the section in question.

It states quite clearly that "If the page limit for any brief is exceeded, a certificate is required stating THE NUMBER OF WORDS CONTAINED IN THE BRIEF."

That appears to say that generally speaking, and not necessarily in whatever hypothetical case you have before you, the certificate is to state the number of words contained in the brief...

Seriously Hawk? You can't be bothered to read the sentence?

Posted by: 6000 at January 17, 2011 10:44 AM

In other news, you could always just pop over to PO and speak the words of power to summon the unholy spirits.

Posted by: 6000 at January 17, 2011 10:47 AM

Examiner 6 posted that his office is just down the hall from SPE Georgia Epps of AU 2878. Somebody please post a list of all of the junior examiners on that hall so that we can identify Examiner 6. It shouldn't be too hard to recognize his terrible writing.

Posted by: We are the Whalers... at January 17, 2011 2:13 PM

Why would we really want to know who Examiner 6 is?

That's like rewarding ineptitude with attention. If not in a position to extinguish the ineptitude, the best one can hope for is to occasionally make fun of it and the rest of the time to simply ignore it.

Posted by: anonymous at January 17, 2011 3:40 PM

"Why would we really want to know who Examiner 6 is?"

JD wants to know who keeps on calling him an unholy spirit and bringing up his modest roots.

Posted by: 6000 at January 18, 2011 12:47 PM